Writing about names wouldn't be complete without explaining my own. Many people assume that Philip Sedley is my real name. It isn't.
For as long as I can remember, I never felt particularly attached to my own name. There was nothing wrong with it, it simply never felt like it suited the creative business I wanted to build. When I decided to launch my wedding photography business, I saw an opportunity to create a brand that felt distinctive, memorable and timeless.
Years ago, we used to joke about creating a "posh" name by combining your middle name with the street you lived on. My middle name is Philip, and I live in Sedley Close. Put the two together and Philip Sedley was born. For me, it was about creating a brand that reflected the style of photography I wanted to offer. Just as fashion houses and creative businesses often trade under carefully chosen brand names, I wanted a name that people would remember.
I'm certainly not the first person to do this. One of the best-known examples is Ted Baker. Despite the name, there has never actually been a fashion designer called Ted Baker. The name was created purely as a brand, proving that sometimes the story behind a name can be every bit as interesting as the name itself. Whether it's a family name passed down through generations, a surname chosen after marriage, or a business name created from scratch, every name tells a story. Mine just happens to begin with Philip... and a street called Sedley Close.
Naming Conventions After Marriage:
Tradition, Choice and What Couples Do Today One of the oldest wedding traditions is changing a surname after marriage. For generations it was almost automatic that a woman would take her husband's surname, symbolising the joining of two lives and the creation of a new family. Today, however, naming conventions are far more personal, with couples choosing the option that best reflects their relationship, careers and identities.
Where Did the Tradition Come From?
The custom of women taking their husband's surname dates back hundreds of years. In many cultures it represented the formation of a new household and, historically, reflected legal traditions where a married couple was recognised under the husband's family name. While society has changed dramatically since then, the tradition remains popular. Many couples still enjoy the symbolism of sharing one family name, even though it is no longer expected.
What Do Modern Couples Choose?
There is no single "right" answer. Today's couples have more options than ever before:
The bride takes the groom's surname.
The groom takes the bride's surname.
Both partners keep their own surnames.
Both partners double-barrel their surnames.
The couple creates an entirely new family surname.
What matters most is that the decision reflects the couple's values rather than social expectations.
The Advantages of Sharing One Surname:
For many couples, having the same surname creates a strong sense of unity. It can simplify family life, particularly when children arrive, as everyone shares the same family name. There are also practical benefits. Travelling, school registrations and official paperwork can sometimes feel more straightforward when the whole family uses one surname. Some people also simply enjoy the feeling of beginning married life with a shared identity.
Reasons to Keep Your Own Name:
For others, a surname represents a lifetime of personal and professional identity. Many women have built careers, qualifications or businesses under their maiden name. Changing it may feel unnecessary or even disruptive, particularly if they are well known professionally. Keeping a surname can also be seen as preserving family heritage or maintaining an independent identity within a marriage. Increasingly, couples view marriage as a partnership of equals where neither person needs to change who they are.
Are Double-Barrelled Names the Answer?
Double-barrelled surnames have become increasingly common, allowing both family names to be retained. While this can feel like a fair compromise, it isn't without challenges. Long surnames can become cumbersome, and future generations may eventually face difficult decisions if both partners already have double-barrelled names.
Is There Still Social Pressure?
Although attitudes have become more relaxed, some people still feel pressure from family traditions or cultural expectations. Equally, women who choose to take their husband's name sometimes find themselves questioned about whether the decision reflects outdated ideas. The reality is that feminism and equality are about having genuine choice. Whether someone changes their surname or keeps it, the important thing is that the decision is theirs.
What About Wedding Photography?
As a wedding photographer, I see every combination imaginable. Some couples have already changed their names before the wedding, while others wait until after the honeymoon. Some never change them at all. One thing never changes: the wedding day is about celebrating your commitment to one another, not what appears on your passport. Whether you're introduced as Mr and Mrs Smith, Mr and Mr Jones, Mrs and Mrs Taylor, or you both keep the names you've always had, your photographs tell the story of your relationship—not your paperwork.
The Final Word:
There was once a time when taking the husband's surname was simply expected. Today, couples have the freedom to choose what feels right for them. Tradition still has an important place in modern weddings, but personal choice matters just as much. Whether you embrace a centuries-old custom or create a new tradition of your own, the name you share, or don't share, is only one small part of the life you build together. After all, a successful marriage isn't defined by a surname. It's defined by the love, respect and commitment behind it.
